Showing posts with label Change. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Change. Show all posts

All time favorite books ...

Reading is a personal journey and if it is really good an odyssey that brings joy, knowledge, a sense of wonder and imagination and of course entertainment.

There's a stage when reading coalesces into something that is more than the sum of the whole. I have definitely not reached this stage. It is going to take a long time before my reading will help me intuit across different genres of reading material.

Right now my reading is still like a reading within a silo bin. I am yet to see cross connections between my reading finance, science, tech, fiction, biology, physics, math, self help etc books. It is the glimmer of wisdom that drives one on. It is my vice.

Still there are some books that stand out and right now with my reading still in infancy according to me - they reflect the same. Nevertheless wisdom can come from the most simple words (koans anyone?) or even an early reader book. I do not belong to the supercilious group that thinks wisdom comes only from philosophy ! Ultimately, deep thinking is what brings wisdom and that can be done even without books !

These books made an impact in my early reading journey. Perhaps I was very impressionable then because while I have read many more books after that I have not added many to this list.

So here goes. In no particular order --

Non-fiction books


1. The 7 habits of highly effective people by Stephen Covey

This book made me come back to reading non-fiction. At that time I had had enough of reading shallow pop psychology books with their cookie cutter answers to everything in sight. They were not true non-fiction and their 'this-solution-fits-all-problems' of life, as if life were a single and simple mathematical construct; annoyed me no end. I had figuratively put my hands in the air and given up finding worthwhile non-fiction! I knew I was definitely not ready to read heavy philosophical tomes either.

Then this book was recommended to me. I was skeptical - I had been burned many times before but I decided to give it a shot. And I did not regret it.

Finally !!! A book that made sense. A book that did not give formulaic answers to the problems in life. Instead it gives you a philosophical framework to work within. All the 7 tenets make sense and they are timeless. The first 3 habits address the individual. The next 3 are interpersonal. And the last one is about self-renewal. The circle of influence vs the circle of concern, the 4 quadrants - to identify goals that are worth pursuing, emotional bank account  - topics that are enduring and relevant.

The line that resonated the most was "Love is a verb". What use is love that does not show itself in loving actions to the beloved? What use are empty words that only talk of feelings not held up by actions?

If I were to write the synopsis here I think I would end up regurgitating the entire book. Better to go and read the book instead !

My take: A must read - bar any qualifications. 

2. The Road Less Traveled by Scott Peck

"Life is difficult" - First line of this the iconic book. I was hooked. In a culture where everything is looked at through rose-colored glasses and denial is paramount, this line was refreshing.

Self-control, self-discipline, delay of gratification are the corner stones of Dr Peck's brand of philosophy.  The roles of responsibility,  truth, important role of parents, suffering and empathy are well elucidated in the book. What stands out however is - the journey from facing one's problems to a path of grace - spiritual growth.

The most important section in the book is on Love (seems like a recurring thread eh ?). He clearly enlightens that love is not dependency, self-sacrifice, sensation or being-in-love.

According to Dr Peck -

"Love is the will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth."

In the section on Love - one description of marital problems stood out.

To quote -

"A common and traditionally masculine marital problem is created by the husband who, once he is married, devotes all his energies to climbing mountains and none to tending to his marriage, or base camp, expecting it to be there in perfect order whenever he chooses to return to it for rest and recreation without his assuming any responsibility for its maintenance."

"An equally common and traditionally feminine marital problem is created by the wife who, once she is married, feels that the goal of her life has been achieved. To her the base camp is the peak. She cannot understand or empathize with her husband’s need for achievements and experiences beyond the marriage and reacts to them with jealousy and never-ending demands that he devote increasingly more energy to the home."

"Male and female both must tend the hearth and both must venture forth."

The entire section on Love is amazing but this description of marriage was superb.

My take: A must read - bar any qualifications (but of course - I am writing about my favorite books after all). 

3. Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance by Robert Pirsig

I have not yet read much straight forward philosophy. So I am yet to read the books by philosophers - Kant, Schopenhauer, Descartes, Socrates, Foucault, Nietzsche or the Vedas, Upanishads, Gita etc . I do have them in my TBR pile but no idea when I will get to them.

So for me this is a difficult book to condense because each reading of the book makes me think very differently. I had a tough time reading this book. The first 2 times I read a few pages and chucked it aside. The 3rd time (after 1.5 years) - it took me 6 months to finish reading it. And it was the only non-fiction book I was reading then. You see the book is a thinking book. A deep thinking book. (Considering the author went insane thinking about these philosophical investigations it is no wonder.) One goes back and forth in the narrative of a motorcycle trip to reacquaint oneself with one's thoughts.

It is a fictionalized autobiography of the author who is mentally ill.  At the end of the book it is revealed that he is subjected to electric shock therapy and his personality changes. However he sees the same behavior in his son Chris and realizes that his son could end up like him. (Chris gets institutionalized too).

Phaedrus is the part of the author that delves into the philosophical questions about quality and life in general. Phaedrus talks about the metaphysics of quality and the entire narrative is about quality and how to approach it. He considers quality as something that cannot be defined completely but must be experienced. The two approaches to life and quality are the "romantic" - which focus on the moment and the "rational" - which look at details, try to understand the workings and try to make rational analysis. In the end he tries to integrate the subjective and objective views of quality into a holistic view.

I re-read this book about 5 years ago and once again its philosophical underpinnings transcend the everyday chaos of life. To me it is a book to philosophy that does not make my head hurt and and yet is not shallow. And in the end it makes me think beyond every day concerns.

What stood out for me -

“Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance” should “in no way be associated with that great body of factual information relating to orthodox Zen Buddhist practice. It’s not very factual on motorcycles either.”

Blind alley, though. If someone’s ungrateful and you tell him he’s ungrateful, okay, you’ve called him a name. You haven’t solved anything.

My take: A must read - if you want to delve into an approachable way to philosophy - especially western philosophy.

Those are my non-fiction favorites - they have stood the test of time and I always look forward to adding more to the list. 

Fiction books


This can devolve into writing many many but I will restrict myself to list only a few that have influenced me into opening up my mental perspectives. The craft of story telling is amazing and a good story is a joy by itself. So those I will list separately on some other day perhaps.

1. Calvin and Hobbes - Yes this is a comic strip ! But some of the most profound thoughts come from this precocious recalcitrant 6-year old with a stupendous (if you have read Calvin you will get this pun!) vocabulary.

Calvin: “Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in
the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.”

Mrs. Wormwood: "What state do you live in?"
Calvin: "Denial."

Calvin: I’m yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you’re old and weak. Am I scary, or what?

Calvin: Everybody seeks happiness! Not me, though! That’s the difference between me and the rest of the world. Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!

I think though Bill Watterson's (The creator of Calvin and Hobbes) finest quote was this  - 

“Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement. In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an eccentric, if not a subversive. Ambition is only understood if it’s to rise to the top of some imaginary ladder of success. Someone who takes an undemanding job because it affords him the time to pursue other interests and activities is considered a flake. A person who abandons a career in order to stay home and raise children is considered not to be living up to his potential — as if a job title and salary are the sole measure of human worth.

You’ll be told in a hundred ways, some subtle and some not, to keep climbing, and never be satisfied with where you are, who you are, and what you’re doing. There are a million ways to sell yourself out, and I guarantee you’ll hear about them.

To invent your own life’s meaning is not easy, but it’s still allowed, and I think you’ll be happier for the trouble.”

2. Pride and Prejudice / Count of Monte Cristo / Sherlock Holmes / A Tale of Two Cities   - Classics which should be read in the original form. Did not read the French original but read the English Translation for Count of Monte Cristo.

3. The Fountainhead / Atlas Shrugged - One will either love Ayn Rand or hate her; there is no in between !

4. Love Story - I started reading this book with a smirk in my mind ! Truly ! The idea that a book spanning hardly 100 pages would be eloquent and expressive of love; was something I found impossible. The reviews also indicated there were no maudlin words in the book. Mentally scoffing - I finished this book and was simply swept away.

The story itself is heartrending and poignant but never again did I underestimate the power of few words to move. I learnt that length of a book did not necessarily equate to its power.  A humbling experience for which I was truly grateful. 

This is no time to be a cynic

Like most Indians - I too feel the anguish of Nirbhaya's death. 

Her death is one in many that get reported. There are those numerous nameless others who suffer this crime and it never goes beyond the victim's knowledge and the perpetrators smug knowing and harrassment.  Many a time the reaction to such incidents is a tired cynical outlook and a "Things never change" attitude. This is no excuse. To be blunt this is not the time to be cynical. Being cynical is to be safe and removed from the feelings of anger.

This case pierced the sense of apathy towards such crimes; and I am thankful that it has. As I go through life I have realized one never knows when the tipping point will occur and what will trigger it. The only thing one can do is contribute even in the face of impossible odds.  You see we need a trickle before it can become a flood. We need the fury against each and every crime. We need the sense of injustice when people misuse their power. We need a sense of outrage against every person who thinks to violate women with impunity.

Yes there is a part of one's mind that knows - the momentum may be lost eventually.  The media will move on to other issues. That does not mean we stop. We never would have won freedom if our freedom fighters had given up after the first war of independence. 

And sometimes ... sometimes it takes one incident to turn the simmering wrath into flash ; history is full of such cases.
  • Roop Kanwar's death which lead to the enactment of Sati related law
  • Montgomery Bus Boycott - that lead to the civil rights movement
  • Rodney King's beating 
Change is never easy.  Change for the better - even more so. 
So ......... Contribute. Make demands. Ask for better implementation of laws and quicker justice.

More importantly look around you and inside yourself - change the underpinning inside that devalues women routinely. Change that sense of entitlement that tells you - it is okay to abuse and then abscond from responsibility of heinous actions by saying "She asked for it". This change goes for both genders. Teach your children respect and empathy.

Make that change - In every house; by each person. There can be no better eulogy than this. An eulogy of action.

Let her death not be in vain. And no - this is no time to be cynical.

RIP Nirbhaya, Amaanat, Damini

Change ...


After sometime a beautiful picture begins to pall , a lovely perfume you get used to and can no longer smell it, wonderful scenery is taken for granted , novelty of possessions fades off ....

Water still for a long time stagnates and a constant diet of rich chocolate desserts would become boring ... and fattening too :) When the same exercise is done daily your muscles get used to it ; within a single day if you were to do the same task obviously you would go out of your mind due to the monotony !

So what does this all mean ?

CHANGE !!! It never ceases to amaze me that change is the only constant and the only thing that one can really like .. and yet it is always fought ... we fight to keep things same .. !!!

Why ???

No new discoveries please .....

I heard this comment the other day in response to reading the book "Prey" by Michael Crichton. -- "That is why I think there should be no discoveries by mankind. All of them lead to nothing but bad things !!"

Uh-oh, I thought ... here we go again. You see this is the third time I have come across this same comment [ from different people ].... and every time I wonder if the person who says this does not understand what exactly he/she is disclosing.

The conversation excerpt -

V : So all discoveries/inventions are bad ?
O : Yes all of them .. just consider Atom Bomb - they tried to discover something and that killed many people in Japan.
Dynamite -this was supposedly for mining but was used in landmines instead ( this I do not know and have not googled it). Vaccination has lead to biological warfare !!! [ The research into germs is the cause it seems ]. It is the curiosity of humanity that causes problems all the time.

V : [ A sweeping statement so I started with just one e.g. ] But what about the fact that nuclear reactors give power ?
O : Why do we need power ? We should go back to the age of candlelight and kerosene lamps.

V : Vaccination has lead to so many children being saved from crippling diseases. That is not important ?
O : Do you see the problems the world is facing due to a burgeoning population ?

V : If you say all discoveries/inventions are bad - then going back to the very beginning - there should be no fire - so no cooking and hence no farming. In fact there should be no evolution at all ! But nature changes all the time ; plants and animals adapt which can be called change or discovering a new better method of survival or evolution.
O : [ After an uncomfortable silence ] Ofcourse I don't mean that - we should go back to the previous generation where people were happier and things were simpler; when humans did not cause so much destruction !!

V : [ Aha ! I did not continue after hearing that statement. I would have been persona non-grata if I had said what I thought. :) I mean history has always been about bloodshed ... so humans not causing destruction is a non-argument ]

I think the person(s) did not realize the new changes that life wrought were frightening or discomfiting to him/her and hence the nostalgic and vehement wish to go back. How often do we hear this ?

" Internet is the worst thing that could happen to kids" [ previously it was TV .. before that ? No idea ... !! :) ].

And even then it is a kind of prejudice when you think that any generation is the best simply because it falls in one's comfort zone !! So would every generation like change to stop at their generation b'cos they think it is best .... !! :) And yet without change .. they never would have arrived at that point of time ... :)

Be it changes due to petroleum refining and need for electricity ( for kerosene ), factories ( for the candles and lamps ), the industrial revolution - which included many many discoveries and inventions, transportation, guns , guillotines .. all the way to the discovery of fire and the wheel..... In some way or another .. all changes are enmeshed and have brought us here .. for better or worse ...... :)))

Like many things .. the whole point seems to be missed - that Internet or TV or curiosity or discoveries/inventions - nothing is inherently evil by itself. It is the usage that causes all the trouble. And change is a juggernaut that cannot be stopped !! No matter how much we resist it !

I hope that .... I do not end up saying some years later ..... "The Internet was better than ...... " :)

Lessons learnt from changing my blogger template .. :)

I changed my blogger template and it proved to be an exercise in frustration. I keep coming across these wonderful websites and it tempted me to change mine. :) Plus I went an extra step and thought "Hey ...let me make my own blogger template too !" Talk about delusions of grandeur !! :)

The previous look of my blog and the current look.




I have no idea how folks actually make a blogger template a day - but I went from trying to make a flamboyant vector transparency blog template to customizing a template in which I would settle for getting the search button icon aligned with my textbox !! You would think that this would be a no-brainer ! But no the textbox and search button icon don't align themselves horizontally without some tweaks ! :) Ofcourse I was always slow at front-end coding but .... :)

So here are my lessons ....

  1. First if you can get away with not changing your blogger template - do so !!! :) Ha ha ha but yeah this hardly makes sense if you want your blog to look unique
  2. Don't start to create a blogger template from scratch - it is easier(???) to customize an existing one. Unless ofcourse you enjoy CSS and those pixel alignments ! :))
  3. There are hundreds of readily available navigation codes on the net - can use them. ( I have not used any - have kept it simple )
  4. If possible search for a template that you can use without requiring any tweaks other than just adding your widgets
  5. The holy grail of blogger template change - backup your existing template !!!
  6. Just as an additional step - backup your blog posts too
  7. Note any specific HTML scripts that you have put in your blog template that is not part of the widgets
    • SEO type meta tags
    • Google Analytics code etc
  8. Contemplate using a test blog if you want to first check how your website will look before making any permanent changes [Create a test blog]. You can use this test blog to even try out new widgets/script that you plan to add.
  9. Can use this link to keep your widgets safe. I found it did the trick
  10. Upload the new template
  11. Reposition the widgets
  12. Add the HTML/javascripts that were not part of the widgets
  13. Add any other new widgets / scripts that you want
  14. Keep your fingers crossed ..... and check how your blog looks after the changes! :)
Enjoy ! :)